There is still a lot of stigma around mental health and I feel like people don’t understand you for various reasons but anyway I wanted to take the opportunity to speak. I’m not doing this for attention but I’m doing this because I want people to know that it is perfectly fine to not be okay. We all have good days and bad days; it’s part of life. If you wish to reach out, I’m here for a chat about whatever you want to talk about. I know that it is hard to reach out. I fully understand it. When you are going through something you don’t want to worry other people, or you feel like you have no one to turn to. I understand. I’ve had that problem. Honestly, the best thing you can do is keep talking and writing things down. There are other methods so it is whichever one you think will help you and remember to keep going no matter how hard it is. There are so many people out there in similar situations to you, you aren’t alone and it does get better.
It has been over 2 years now since I first started struggling with my mental health. I didn’t understand what I was going through or what was happening or even why I felt this way. I really did feel awful about myself. I went through counseling but still found it very difficult to speak out but I didn’t understand why. It was very difficult and frustrating for me because I wanted to be myself but I just couldn’t. It took me a while to get my head around when I was diagnosed with social anxiety, panic attacks and selective mutism. I felt they were labels that I was carrying around and that’s what people saw me for. It was hard. Everyday, I blamed myself for my current situation because I didn’t think anything I was doing was right. I put myself down and ended up having low self-esteem. I put myself through a lot and it did have a big impact. I know it’s never going to be an easy route to recovery; it’s like you’re on a rollercoaster going up and down, but it will be worth it when you come off at the other end.
Honestly, I am feeling a lot happier than I felt when I was first diagnosed. I have my days, but I know I get through it well. For me, it never made any sense. I thought having mental health problems meant you are weak, stupid, not strong enough as well as many other negative things. The people who supported me and gave me the love and kindness I needed proved me wrong; they showed me that I was enough and that I can get through this. So, to anyone suffering from a mental illness – don’t doubt your worth. You can get through this! Each and every day is a battle, but remember, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. I’m proud of you no matter what. Remember you are doing the best you can.
Thank you for reading my story.
I’m currently a student at the University of Derby studying Early Childhood Studies. My dreams are to become a primary school teacher because I have a passion for helping those children who get left out or are classed as shy. I am interested in mental health and supporting others after and hoping to inspire others to have self-belief and faith in themselves.